A super fantasy for Super Tuesday
Photo by Vidar Nordli-Mathisen on Unsplash
Well, it?s Super Tuesday. I woke up and started the day as I start each day ? by pleasuring myself with my Satisfier clitoral suction machine. I don?t know what happened. Suddenly I felt kind of dizzy and who did I see floating above me ? none other than the beautiful Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Well, to be honest with you, that?s not the first time I?ve thought of her during masturbation ? she is super hot and wonderful. But this wasn?t just a thought. It was actually her, in what mystics describe as a ?fluid? state. She was sort of see-through.
?What am I doing here?? she complained. ?I?m supposed to be back in DC working on legislation the Squad.?
?I?m sorry AOC,? I said. ?I would never interrupt your important work on establishing a socialist utopia.?
She sort of sighed then and said, ?Alright come with me.?
She grabbed my hands and we started floating up right through the ceiling of my apartment building, up into the sky and then into space.
?Don?t be afraid,? she assured me. ?Look there.?
I saw there gleaming in the distance the beautiful green city of the socialist future. We landed in the middle of a park. There were swans swimming in a pond and green grass and flowers everywhere and people were riding bicycles and unicycles and walking on stilts.
?Hi Christine,? I heard a familiar voice say, and I turned to see Bernie walking towards me.
?Bernie! This is amazing!?
?Well, thanks to your two-dollar and seventy cent contribution, young lady, I was able to become president and create this socialist wonderland!?
?Is there medicare for all??
?Of course,? he said. ?And free college!?
?And everything is solar-powered,? threw in AOC. ?By this amazing sunshine machine that Bernie and I invented.?
She pointed up above the park where there was a giant contraption that looked like something out of Dr. Seus, with all these funnels, and bells and whistles. Out of the smokestacks of this amazing machine came burping out these miniature suns, with smiling faces, and they floated off to give people all over the land the power they needed.
?You guys are the best!? I said.
?And now, close your eyes, and when you open them we will all be naked,? said Bernie.
I did so.
And when I opened my eyes, it was just like he promised. AOC was naked next to me in the bed, and we were kissing. I saw Bernie naked standing at the end of the bed, pleasuring himself.
?I have to remain loyal to my wife,? he explained. ?She?ll allow me to do this, nothing more.?
So then AOC I made love while Bernie watched. I didn?t even mind his old-man bod. In fact he looked pretty sexy.
?Are you feeling the Bern?? he said, as AOC and I sixty-nined.
?Oh yeah,? I said. ?I?m feeling it. I?m Bernin? up, baby.
?Brothers and sisters,? he said. ?We need to all come together!?
And we did.
I orgasmed, AOC orgasmed and Bernie ejaculated. His ejaculate turned into confetti raining down on us and it was miraculous.
?Now, close your eyes and when you open them we will be back on earth and it will be Super Tuesday again,? said AOC.
I closed my eyes and when I opened them again I was back in my bed. My Satisfier vibrator was on fire on the bed next to me.
?Jesus!? I said, smothering the flames with a pillow. ?I really did feel the Bern.?
But I was filled with a happiness and a hope that I hadn?t felt for?.forever! I had seen the future and it was beautiful and it was super sexy, and that was all because of Bernie and AOC.
I got up and went to the school down the street to vote. I got into the booth, and I came to the page where you choose the presidential candidate. I hesitated for some reason.
?Is it really too good to be true,? I wondered, ?All this talk of revolution and socialist paradise??
I looked down the list. There was Joe Biden. Old Joe. More of the same. Centrist nothingness. Keep letting Wall Street do whatever it wants. Keep funding the military so that the US continues to spend more on the military than the next 23 countries combined. Keep the one percent in their little mansions. Keep the middle class in the cellar like that family in Parasite. I mean, really?come on.
I remembered the delicious morning I had just experienced with my heroes.
I pressed the name of Bernie Sanders as a candidate for president.
I felt the Bern.
I really felt it.
I don?t know if I really believe I will ever experience that fabulously sexy threesome in the future socialist paradise.
But I can dream, baby. I can dream?
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