Take it from me ? bigger isn?t always better
Photo by: Dead Drobot / Shutterstock
The average length of an erect penis is 5.16 inches.
I know that, but only intellectually. It?s a statistic I come across once in a while. But it?s not something I know from experience.
If you were to line up all the penises I?ve ever stroked, sucked, or fucked, not only would you be in for quite a long and interesting night, but you?d also assume that I must be a genuine size queen.
A few minutes with a measuring tape (or maybe just a few seconds eyeballing them) would show you those dicks undeniably trend on the longer side.
But I never sought out guys with a bigger package. And getting it wasn?t always the blessing people often assume it is.
From Big to Bigger
I gave my virginity to a guy whose penis was about 6.5 to 7 inches when it stood at attention. I didn?t measure it, and it was the first one I had in the flesh, so I had no point of comparison other than the thick hogs I?d seen in porn films.
I assumed what I was dealing with was an average cock, so it became my point of reference. And almost everyone I hooked up with after him had roughly the same length.
There were a few notable exceptions.
The first one that comes to mind was a charming and slightly older guy I met and fucked on a train. I was surprised when I first gripped his dick because of how short it was ? my whole hand covered it and I had to think on my feet to figure out how you give a handjob when you can?t just stroke your clenched fist up and down the shaft.
But what really surprised me was his girth. His erection was short, but you definitely couldn?t call it small. When I wrapped my fingers around it, it felt a little familiar because it was exactly like holding a soda can. It was the thickest cock I?ve ever fucked and I have never even come close to finding another with as much girth.
The other outlier was on the other end of the spectrum. This was one of those brief relationships where I couldn?t quite figure out if I was planning to dump this guy or settle down and marry him. In the end, I chose the former. But for the brief time I was with him, I got to handle the longest dick I?ve seen in person.
By this point, I had been with enough guys to know how to gauge the size and compare it to others. I can confidently say that his was a whole 9 inches when fully erect. I wouldn?t be surprised if you could add a few decimals to it.
In between the soda can cock and getting nine-inch nailed, every single guy I?d been with was in the 6.5 to 7.5 inches range. So, you can imagine my surprise when I finally got around to reading the stats on penis size.
In the end, I married someone on the larger side. Since I was settling down permanently with this dick, I wanted to know it better than the others. So, I broke out the measuring tape so I could get some solid (pun intended) data and found out that his is 8 inches long when it?s ready for action.
My Small Dick Fantasies
A lot of people have a bigger is better attitude when it comes to cock. And you might think that I?m the same given that I?ve had a streak that would make any size queen proud. But the truth is, it?s not always a picnic.
Big dicks can be a lot of fun, but they can also be challenging. For every time a big cock works you right, there are times when it just feels like too much. That kind of size means having to be a little more careful so that the sex doesn?t turn from pleasant to painful. Getting in a good sexual position can take a lot of precision, too. Get it in at the wrong angle and you?re in for a fair bit of discomfort.
I also can only go so deep when I give oral, so being with guys on the larger side meant I?d never been able to take someone?s whole cock into my mouth.
Those downsides, along with a healthy dose of natural curiosity, made me wonder what it would be like sleeping with someone on the smaller side. Hooking up with a guy who has a more modest package became one of my fantasies.
To satisfy some of my curiosity, I would occasionally go on porn streaming sites and search ?tiny dick.? There were a lot of humiliation videos, which I skipped over because that?s really not my jam. The other stuff I found was great.
The Way You Talk About Penis Size Says A Lot About You
I can?t respect folks who crack jokes about a micropenis.
If you haven?t seen any, let me assure you that porn featuring guys with small cocks ? yes, even micropenises ? is hot. Like, really hot. Because what you watch are couples who are into each other. You get to see women treating their guy?s dick lovingly ? and being treated well in return.
Watching all that loving, erotic attention being showered onto those erections, I didn?t once miss those thick beasts you see all over mainstream porn.
Dick Aesthetics Is About More Than Size
When I reflect on my life as an unintentional size queen, I realize that it?s taught me two lessons.
The first one has to do with dick aesthetics.
When it comes to how good a dick looks, there?s always an emphasis on size. And not just size, but length specifically.
But that?s such a narrow conception of what makes for a good-looking dick.
I?ve had size a-plenty, and I have to say that it doesn?t factor that much into the presentation.
The shape is a big factor ? I?ve had the range from sleek to mushroom-capped. You also have to consider the curve. And then there?s the surface texture ? slick and smooth to veiny and bumpy.
When I think of the best looking dicks I?ve had, there?s no real correlation with length. Some of the nicest ones were in my (admittedly high) average zone.
And of course, as with all of aesthetic preferences, it?s incredibly subjective. Maybe length makes a huge difference for you. Maybe you like looking at really girthy ones. Maybe you cream your jeans for veiny ridges. Maybe if, given the choice, you?d hands-down choose to worship the mushroom cap.
No matter the size or shape, every single dick out there is someone?s masterpiece.
A Good Dicking Comes in All Sizes
I?m perfectly happy with my husband?s cock ? as far as I?m concerned, he?s got real boyfriend dick. But when I married him, I was a little bummed out that my desire to sleep with someone who was average-sized ? or smaller than average ? would never get fulfilled.
Well, I was wrong. For us, settling down for life didn?t mean we?d never hook up with anyone else. We do almost everything as a couple, and once in a while that includes our close friends.
When one of those friends joined us in a threesome, I pulled down his boxers and discovered that he was on the smaller size ? a bit below average for sure. I finally had my chance to act out what I?d seen in those porn videos.
A lot of our fantasies are great in our imagination but they don?t play out well in real life. (Those gangbangs you masturbated to were fun to picture but you might not exactly have the time of your life when you?re getting shared by three guys who have serious trouble coordinating.) But this wasn?t like that at all. That small dick gave me an incredible ride. It delivered everything I thought it would, and it was a whole lot more fun than most of the bigger ones I?d been with.
My husband had a few inches on him, but neither of them failed to thoroughly and completely satisfy me. And both of them did a better job than the longest and thickest guys I?ve been with.
I?ve met a lot of guys who have a severe case of size anxiety. Because they don?t measure up to Manuel Ferrara or Rocco Siffredi, they worry about being able to satisfy their partners.
I understand why they feel that way, but they?ve got it all wrong. Instead of fretting about the size they can?t change, they really should work on being communicative and attentive. As someone who?s had her share of big cocks, I can safely say that there are pros and cons for every shape and size. But there are absolutely no downsides to being responsive to your partner?s needs and wants.
If you want to hear more discussion of dick size, check out the Does Size Matter? episode of my podcast, Pillow Talk with Emma Austin.
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