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Guys who get off on ass play aren?t necessarily gay. I mean there?s nothing wrong with being gay and having anal sex. Men have anal sex because it feels good. But for that same reason, straight men can enjoy it, too.
Think about it ? not only is a man?s anus super sensitive, but his anal canal is sensitive too. Part of that is thanks to his prostate. At least this is what men have told me.
By stimulating the prostate, men can orgasm just from that. I?ve seen this happen with my own eyes. Men are able to ejaculate without even touching their penises, just from the stimulation to their anuses, thanks to the prostate.
However, because of the stigma around men and anal sex, men can get quite secretive when it comes to ass play. Take it from me: getting off on having something in your butt doesn?t mean you?re gay. It just means you like pleasure.
The psychological benefits of ass play.
For some guys, ass play is a psychological thrill. Think of being taken like a woman by a woman. If you get off on being submissive, there?s nothing that makes a man feel more meek than bottoming while taking something in his bottom.
For this reason, I often incorporate ass play into my sessions with my submissive clients.
To make a man feel extra-submissive, I like to position him either on all fours or on his back. I love to see a man with his feet in the air, or those feet resting on my shoulders before I take him like a girl.
However, anal play is great for men who want to feel dominant as well. There?s nothing that says you?re owning a woman quite like ordering her to worship your butthole.
Ass play can make a blowjob even more enjoyable for a man. As a woman explores his testicles, she dives deeper, licking down his taint until she reaches his butthole.
Of course, for analingus, good hygiene is necessary. I demand that the men I rim to have stepped right out of the shower.
One of my favorite positions for analingus is when the guy sits on my face. While lying on my back below him, I?m able to sneak my tongue between his ass cheeks while I reach up to cup his balls and stroke his dick with my free hands.
And yes, it does make me feel very submissive to be in that position. It also gives a guy a lot of control in that he can move his ass however he wants on my face. He can grind his butt into my mouth to smother me and to force my tongue deeper inside his anus. I know from personal experience that it feels amazing to have a tongue inside your asshole. I can only imagine that it feels amazing for a guy, too.
Fingering the butt.
A great way to begin exploring the ass is with one?s own finger. This way, a man can learn exactly how he likes to have his ass stimulated.
By starting by fingering himself, a man can control just how deep he wants to go. He can also determine how many fingers he can take at a time. He can start slowly, rubbing the outside of his anus before he inserts his finger inside. Maybe he only penetrates himself up to the first knuckle. He doesn?t have to go any deeper than that.
Of course I recommend using a lot of lubricant during any ass-play session. There are some great synthetic lubricants on the market, but since it?s just your finger you?re putting inside, you can basically use anything to lubricate yourself. Vaseline, olive oil, coconut oil, lotion. You don?t have to worry about using oil-based lubricants that can break down the latex of a condom.
I also recommend that a guy goes slowly because it takes some time to get used to having something inside your butt. The first time I had a finger inside my anus, it hurt a little. But within time, I got used to the sensation, so I relaxed and realized I could take much more.
The anus needs time to open. We tend to have a psychological hangup about having things inside our butts. We tense from the fear of having our asses penetrated. Men are even worse in this respect.
At least as women, we?re used to being penetrated vaginally, and there isn?t as much stigma around ass play for a girl. So just relax, and take it easy. When you?re ready, you can invite a girl to play with you, too.
I like to work my finger in a guy?s butt slowly. As he gets used to having one of my fingers inside, I insert more. Communication is key. Just keep checking in with your partner. He?ll tell you when you can put another finger in, and how deep you can go.
But once a man gets used to having something inside his butt, it?s incredible how much the anus stretches. I?ve not only put my whole fist inside a man?s bottom, but I?ve worked my fist in so deep that my entire forearm was inserted inside his colon.
This particular client liked to have me stroke his dick while I pushed my fist in and out. In order to help him relax, he often smoked a little weed. He even had me inject wine into his anus with a turkey baster. The alcohol was quickly absorbed by his butt membranes into his bloodstream, which not only made him drunk, but it seriously loosened him up. And of course, like I said, you need to make sure a butt is really clean before you do this.
This particular client spent hours cleaning himself out by giving himself three to four enemas. Ultimately, if you?re going to take anything that deep inside your anus, I recommend giving yourself an enema beforehand, if not more than one.
Plugging the butt.
A great way for a man to start training himself to take something in his butt is to wear a butt plug. This is a device that fits inside his anus. Since it?s tapered at the top and then gets wider and wider until it ends in a stub at the bottom, the plug slides in and locks into place inside the anus.
As butt plugs can be worn for long amounts of time, this is a great exercise to loosen up a guy. Plugs come in a variety of different sizes. I?ve seen everything from a plug with a diameter of a half-inch to those with a diameter of a foot. Like I said, you?d be amazed how far the ass can widen once it?s relaxed.
Dildoes and strap-on play.
Perhaps the best way to stimulate an asshole, though, is with a dildo. When alone, I recommend a guy using a dildo that has a suction cup at one end, which attaches to another object to hold it in place. I?ve seen guys suction a dildo to the wall and then back up onto it to penetrate themselves. I?ve also seen men suction the dildo to the top of a toilet seat or to the floor of the shower, and then lower themselves into it.
This allows men to ride the dildo while leaving their hands free to stroke their penises.
But I think most men will agree that playing with a partner is more enjoyable.
I?ve had clients who wanted me to either watch them penetrate themselves with a dildo or be penetrated by me while I wore the dildo in a strap-on harness.
This is a hugely popular fantasy for so many of my clients. It?s definitely a psychological thrill. They love to see me walk in the room with a hard penis.
To do this, I fit the dildo into place in the strap-on harness. Starting with a small dildo is best. I work up from there until a guy can take a dildo that?s the size of a man?s actual penis.
And as I mentioned, hygiene is super important when it comes to any aspect of ass play. I not only put condoms on all my dildoes, but I disinfect them after every use.
I also always use latex gloves when working on a guy?s ass I don?t know.
And yet I still believe that ass play is one of the best ways for two lovers to explore their intimacy. Just remember: start slow and use lots of lubricant. And don?t forget the most important part: have an open mind. Your butt will soon to follow.