Oops, I made a sexy mistake
Photo by: Dean Drobot / Shutterstock
I was ten years old when I got my first bra.
My mom looked at my chest and said ?I think it?s time to get you a training bra.?
Her tone sounded almost judgmental, like my breasts were a problem. I didn?t really see how they could be, since I still wasn?t able to fill an A cup.
It made me self-conscious, and bra shopping made it worse. After I tried one on, she asked me to step out of the fitting room so she could see what I looked like with it on.
I didn?t look great. The bra was cheap and unattractive, an ugly cream color with lace along the top. And now it was mine.
Later that day, we visited my aunt. When she found out I was wearing my first bra, she congratulated me, told me I had just taken my first step into womanhood, and asked me to lift my shirt so she could see it.
My mom and my aunt both gave me different reactions but I got the same message from both: wearing a bra is a big fucking deal.
From that day on, I wore bras religiously.
I did it because I felt like I was supposed to, but also because I liked the way they made my chest look.
I was so attached to wearing my bra that I slept in one every night.
When I started having sex, I kept my bra on then too. No one actually tried unclasp it. And because I was convinced bras were essential for making my tits attractive, I wasn?t going to volunteer.
So, I wore bras non-stop for 20 years and then I learned the joys of going braless.
Laundry, My Nemesis
It was all because of laundry.
I?ve never been on good terms with laundry, and once my husband and I had four kids, there was just no way to stay on top of it all.
It just kept piling up and it stayed low on our very long list of priorities.
The problem is, I only owned two bras at this point. When they were both in the laundry hamper, I wouldn?t see them for a while.
I could?ve bought some more, but I was losing weight and I didn?t want to buy new ones if I?d just have to replace them soon after.
So, I just kept winding up with no clean bras. And to my surprise, I liked it.
I always wore bras because I felt like I was supposed to. I never even considered going braless. But now, I?ll take it off almost as soon as we get home from running errands. When I feel like having a chill day, I might not bother to wear one at all.
I?ve been sleeping better since I ditched the night bra, and it just feels comfortable to go without it.
The only thing I wouldn?t do is go out without a bra. That just seemed inappropriate.
But sometimes, my brain fog wins.
Why Does It Feel So Cold?
The next step in my braless journey happened by accident.
I got ready in the morning because I had an appointment at a garage at 11 o?clock. I did my makeup, got dressed, but I didn?t put on my bra because I didn?t have to leave for a few hours.
When it was time to go, I completely forgot about the fact that I wasn?t wearing a bra.
We went to the garage, then walked to a nearby cafe for lunch. We were near the entrance when I first noticed it ? a gust of wind blew my coat open and made my nipples hard.
I grabbed my husband?s shoulder and said, ?Oh my God, I just realized I?m not wearing a bra!?
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I still had every other layer of clothes on but I suddenly felt completely naked.
I tried to decide what to do. Spending 20 minutes walking home so I could put my bra on seemed a little much. So did going to the second-hand store and praying I find something decent in my size.
It was cold. We were hungry. So, I decided to power through and we walked into the cafe.
I was so nervous about taking off my coat. A little part of me felt that as soon as I?d take it off, everyone would notice. It would be all eyes on me ? well, on my conspicuous nipples ? and I?d have to blush my way through my meal.
I moved my shirt strategically so it wasn?t clinging to my otherwise bare breasts.
I kept glancing around to see everyone?s reaction.
But there was none.
Of course there was none.
I was worried for nothing. No one even looked up from their coffee cups or laptops.
As we ate, talked, and laughed at how quickly our toddler was eating his share of the chocolate cake, I got more and more comfortable. By the end, I forgot I wasn?t wearing a bra.
Our van still wasn?t ready, so we walked through town, browsed a few shops, and bought some makeup. And again, nothing happened. No stares. No weird looks.
I realized that going braless was only a big deal in my head.
I had internalized the idea that it was inappropriate. I didn?t really know why it was inappropriate. It?s just one of those things that felt wrong and had felt wrong for as long as I could remember.
And even though I didn?t actually believe that only girls who want that kind of attention went out braless, that was somewhere in my subconscious.
That?s a total load of crap. I mean, sure, there are some women who go out braless for attention, but more power to them. That kind of sexual confidence should be praised.
But I?m willing to bet more of us are going out braless just because we?re forgetful and distracted. Or maybe the laundry is just getting out of hand.
Or we just don?t care. Because no one cares. No one has time to worry about whether you?re wearing a bra or not, so you shouldn?t really worry about it, either. Just do what feels right. And if that?s letting the cold wind harden your nips, so be it.
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