But it?s not why you think
How I imagine I look in bed (Licensed from Adobe)
The first time, lucky fella, that you get this lovely lady into the sack, you can take off all my clothes and I will lie down on your bed, with just my heels on. And you can have your way with me.
I know, it?s porn-y, and slutty glam, and sexy, right?
What is it about heels that makes a woman seem so desirable? Let?s ask science.
Get Over Here, Science.
Science has its own opinion about why heels are sexy. One study says they accentuate the femininity of the woman?s gait. Another study says it increases the arch of the woman?s back, which makes her seem more attractive for childbearing. Another points out that it lengthens the leg, makes the woman taller.
But Science, that?s all about women walking in heels. When I?m in bed with just my black negligee and my heels, why do I look so damn sexy and why does he almost cum before he even touches me? I?m not walking, I?m just lying there waiting to be fucked.
Explanations of why men find heels so sexy are a little more complex. First of all, you must remember that the stiletto heel is named after a dagger.
Danger, Danger!
The one thing I know about boys is that danger is their real mistress. When I was growing up, the guys I surfed with seemed like they actually wanted to be attacked by sharks. They?d get all excited whenever they surfed near one. I never understood that. I would piss myself every time I saw a dolphin because I was not very good at marine identification and I would always mistake them for Jaws. But the guys wanted danger. They wanted the huge waves, the wicked crashes, the gnarly wipe outs. I, on the other hand, wanted the opposite when I surfed ? to avoid danger, to not wipe out and to survive.
For some strange reason, boys don?t seem that interested in survival.
So, when they go to bed with a woman with daggers on her feet, I guess it?s kind of like being attacked by a shark ? which they like. Go figure!
Even if he?s not a surfer, your guy always fantasized about being a secret agent, a spy, a soldier, a fireman or a cowboy living a life of adventure and risk.
Fucking you in just heels is the closest he?s going to come to living any of those fantasies in real life. What a great gift you?re giving him!
It Changes the Way You Talk
Lying in bed in just heels, you automatically become a femme fatale. I find my voice drops a register and I all of a sudden start saying droll things in a husky, Lauren Bacall voice. ?You know how to blow, don?t you Rick? You just put your lips together and whistle.? Wait a minute, I think that?s backward.
Anyhow, anything you say will sound sexy in this new husky voice, and hopefully he won?t ruin this mood by asking you if you have something stuck in your throat. He?ll go with it. And you?ll find yourself saying daring things. Well, it?s not really you, it?s the shoes talking through you.
It?s like a slutty version of that movie about the red shoes that come to life. Your black heels have come alive, but they don?t know how to dance. They just know how to talk dirty.
Matchy Matchy
I have found that being completely naked in heels is awesome, but it?s improved by a matching nail color. Again, it?s the danger. If you have some nice long red nails to match your red heels, that?s going to go a long way to enhance the aesthetic of danger, excitement, naughtiness and passion. It?s also quite feminine. I like to add a third matching color somewhere in my eye shadow to further this effect.
Now it?s not like your guy is some scion of fashion or connoisseur of design. He probably won?t notice this effect consciously, but we?re working on a deeper level here.
It?s about grandeur and glamor as well. Did you know that the first people to wear high heels were Persian horsemen? Think spurs that jingle jangle jingle. The high heels helped kick the horses in the ass, I guess. These heels were such a turn on to the ladies that the females themselves adopted them as a pose of the grand life, the royal and elite way.
So in addition to the feeling that he?s doing something dangerous, there is also this feeling of the exotic.
Of course, there are other ways to add to this effect. Matching black lace underwear of course, with the black heels. I?m not a big fan of the whole suspenders and stockings with heels look, although guys apparently are, as it?s ubiquitous in porn. But for a first date, for instance, it screams ?trying too hard.? And if he senses you are desperate to please, that will completely cancel all the aforementioned danger and exoticism. So play it cool.
A good combo with black heels is that slightly goth black lipstick. I know it can seem scary, but trust me, guys like a touch of goth, because it punches up the exotic, the witchy, the magic quality of feminine sexuality.
Bright cherry red lipstick, while not matching your black heels, is also extremely effective, because of the contrast. The lips will really pop when set against the black bra, the skin, the heel.
He Loves the Smell of Leather in the Evening
Of course, he?s going to be attracted by these heeled pumps at the bottom of your naked body. He?ll make his way down there, kiss your ankles, and inhale the intoxicating scent of a worn leather shoe.
Unless your feet stink, in which case it?s probably better to keep him ?upstairs?, glancing down from time to time at that exotic, dangerous world of your high heels.
But if you use some foot powder and cure yourself of those various fungal disorders going on down there, encourage the guy to play around, because the smell of leather is a proven aphrodisiac.
But This is Why I Wear Heels to Bed
It?s great that they are scary and sexy and erotic and all that. But the only reason I wear pumps to bed is, well, bunyons.
Yeah, I?ve got really ugly feet.
The kind of feet that makes a guy lose his hard on. Misshapen, grotesque club feet. I mean, horrible. Made worse by years of kick boxing which mashed them up into fleshy little knots, with two big red bumps sticking out the side like Rudolph noses.
Yeah, I hate my feet. I love me, but I hate my feet, and I?m far too ashamed to show them to anybody on the first date. After they?re in love with me I?ll kick my shoes off, wear my Christmas socks to bed, or even my favorite Vans. But I start off with the heels. It?s all part of the ?illusion? of Christine. They?ll think I?m something I?m not, see? Brilliant plan, huh?
The Shoe?s on the Other Foot
As a bisexual, I have had the pleasure of bedding a female who wears her heels to bed. I do like ultra-feminine, straight women. What the heel does for me is enhance the thrill of ?corrupting? a woman that I get. It?s like I?ve got this fancy female who usually entertains the powerful, elite patriarchy, but I?ve pried her away from all that and kidnapped her to my own private island of Lesbos.
But my favorite is for her to be wearing the open toe Goddess heel. I can go down there and worship her like the Goddess she is. I really do feel sometimes that mythical fairy tale quality when I?m with a woman in goddess heels. Like she?s Aphrodite herself, and I am one of her adoring nymphs or naiads.
But I?ve been with a woman in the more standard femme fatale black stilettos. It?s sexy and exotic too. The feeling that I always have in this case is, ?I?m fucking the boss.? I like that!
At the end of the day, we just look more naked if we still have something on, like heels, or a bit of underwear clinging to us somewhere.
Especially if it?s hiding our bunions!
