After six days of waiting (fuck the no delivery on Sundays thing), my Birddogs are finally here. I?ve been fantasizing about this day for almost a week now, and after trying them out for a full day yesterday, I?ve reached a verdict. Birddogs are FUCKING DOPE.
They are seriously like no shorts I?ve ever tried before. I thought I?d reached the pinnacle of shorts technology with Chubbies, but Birddogs have upped the ante. Everything about these shorts is as awesome as advertised. The built in liner is as comfortable, if not more so, than premium brand compression shorts. The side and back pockets are spacious enough to fit an iPhone 7, and the front pockets can comfortably hold your keys, phone, and wallet without giving you anxiety about them falling out unnoticed every time you sit down. The material that the shorts themselves are made out of is super stretchy and soft, a lot like how I image Lululemon clothing is. And to top it all off, they?re stylish as hell too. The 8 inch inseam is the perfect length to show off some muscular man-thigh without looking like a douchebag, and the bright orange accent on the back of the shorts gives the classic black color just the right amount of personality.
These shorts look fresh as fuck and are as comfortable as not wearing shorts at all. The only knock I?ll give Birddogs is for the built in liner. The liner feels amazing and is definitely great for working out, but because it?s a part of the shorts, once your balls inevitably sweat, stink, and dirty up the liner ? the entire pair of shorts is dirty. Birddogs are meant to be worn without any additional underpants on, and now that we?re in the hot and humid months of Summer, my ballsack is naturally going to start sweating a lot more than usual. Pair that with the fact that my apartment?s AC unit is broken and we?re looking at swamp ass city: population, me. I wore my Birddogs yesterday (and I?m wearing them again right now) and I can already feel them getting a little gross in the crotch region.
For what it?s worth though, I?m pretty certain these are meant to be used primarily as gym shorts. Most people probably won?t wear them more than once without washing them in the first place, but my lazy ass hates doing laundry so I try to rewear relatively clean clothing as much as possible. If I throw them in my hamper they probably won?t see the light of day again for three or four weeks.
I definitely am a huge fan of these shorts but because of my ball stank and unwillingness to do laundry, I?d have to give Chubbies a slight edge in the battle for best short-shorts. Birddogs are more practical and probably more comfortable than Chubbies, but until I move back home for the rest of Summer and have my mom doing my laundry for me again, I?m not gonna be able to wear my Birddogs without washing them for more than three days tops.
Either that, or I could figure out a way to stop my balls from smelling like a hockey team locker room.
See you tomorrow.
