Believe it or not, the secret is missionary
Photo by: fizkes / Shutterstock
A few years ago, I had a very memorable date night with my husband.
That?s my classy way of saying we ate a late dinner, watched Shameless, got drunk, and fucked.
Nothing out of the ordinary, but what made it memorable was the sex.
In all honesty, it was kind of routine (we were in a bit of a rut) and the rum made us a little too sloppy. But when Mr. Austin laid on me and gave me some good old fashioned missionary, it felt way better than it normally did.
The stimulation was more intense. It made me moan so loudly I was worried I?d wake the kids. And the orgasm that capped it off was stronger than the ones I normally get from penetration alone.
That night ? that orgasm ? is imprinted in my long-term memory. I never forgot it. But I also never understood it.
What the hell made it so good?
Was I just so damn horny that it felt more intense than usual? Did I have the perfect blood alcohol level for an incredibly sexy time? Did Mr. Austin somehow hit on a perfect rhythm?
Whatever it was, it worked.
And then it was gone.
Before that night, I never felt that kind of stimulation from penetration alone. And after that night, I didn?t feel it again. It was like some weird fluke that I couldn?t recreate.
A few days ago, I happened on a blog post about the coital alignment technique. And then, all the pieces fit together. That?s how we accidentally had sex on that highly memorable date night.
I Live for Blended Orgasms
Blended orgasms are my jam. They?re the ones you get from experiencing multiple types of sexual stimulation at once.
You can get one from combining nipple play with manual sex. Or you can have one from simultaneous vaginal and anal penetration.
Basically, pick two things that tickle your fancy and do them both at once and you?re likely to have a more intense orgasm as a result.
One of my favorite ways to get a blended orgasm is to combine penetrative sex with clitoral stimulation (using fingers or a vibrator).
The only downside to them is that they can be logistically tricky. Some positions don?t lend themselves that well to them.
When I do doggystyle, for instance, I need both arms to prop myself up, so I can?t use one hand to rub my clit. Mr. Austin could, but reaching around like that would fuck up his rhythm and depth control.
Spooning is one of my go-to sex positions, but clitoral stimulation can be tricky for that one, too. I can only keep my leg up in the air for so long before I need to give my quads a break.
I can do it during missionary, but only if Mr. Austin is holding himself up at enough of an angle.
I never wished for a man with two dicks, but having a second one to rub against my clit would at least make some of these things a lot easier.
Vibrating Cock Ring ? Not a Re-Buy
In my quest to have more convenient or even hands-free blended orgasms during sex, I once bought a vibrating cock ring.
In theory, I could slip the rubber ring around the base of Mr. Austin?s shaft and the small vibrator that sits on top of it could give me some clitoral action.
In practice, though, it wasn?t all that great. The problem was the thrusting ? it broke up the stimulation I got from the vibrator.
Instead of constant vibration, I felt like I was being teased by my sex toy. And that?s not my scene. I don?t even use any of the patterned settings on my vibrators because constant stimulation is what works for me.
We didn?t use it for long. We just had unassisted penetrative sex instead (can?t complain) and now we skip the vibrating cock ring category whenever we?re shopping for new toys.
Getting Blended Orgasms from Penetration Alone
Thankfully, there?s something better than a vibrating cock ring, and it doesn?t even have to be charged. It?s a sex position called the coital alignment technique (CAT).
CAT is a modified version of missionary that basically changes the angle of penetration. Instead of the standard missionary positioning, the one doing the penetrating moves their pelvis up a bit so that they?re basically penetrating at an angle approaching 90 degrees ? more or less downward.
Shout out to my fellow elder millennials (source: https://www.dlmusicas.pw/mp3/DownStab.html)
When you get the angle right, the head and top of the shaft will take care of the penetration while the base of the shaft will rub against the clit.
When I read about it, I just had to try it. I told Mr. Austin about it and strongly implied that I wanted it that same night.
He delivered. And the position delivered, too. Without using any fingers or toys, I was getting fucked while my clit was being rubbed. And it all ended in a strong blended orgasm.
Until this week, I hadn?t even heard of this position. Now, I?m putting it in our regular rotation.
Leveling Up the Missionary Position
I?m a fan of the missionary position. It doesn?t deserve its reputation as boring or bad sex. But that doesn?t mean it can?t be better.
Most women haven?t achieved an orgasm from penetration alone. The coital alignment technique could help with that. The clitoral stimulation it gives is more subtle than the one you can get from fingers or a vibrator, but it?s worth a try.
It?s also worth experimenting with it if you can orgasm from penetration. I can orgasm from penetration alone, but the ones I get from this position are better.
I got that same kind of orgasm a few years ago. I thought maybe it had something to do with me being drunk. But now I know, it?s more likely that it was because Mr. Austin was. My theory is that he had one drink too many and he ended up fucking me at a weird (but fantastic) angle.
Now that I know what happened, I don?t have to get him sloppy drunk to recreate it. I can just nudge him up a few inches and take missionary sex to the next level.
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