Funniest 50 Dirty quotes and sex quotes of all time

+Funniest 50 Dirty quotes and sex quotes of all time

Here is a collection of funny Dirty quotes and funny sex quotes.

funny sex quotes,Dirty quotes

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1.?I need to have sex, It?s been too long.?movie quotes about sex

2.?Why? Why? WHy does he have to have a small di*k? I really like him.?movie quotes about sex

3.?Let?s settle this argument like adults: in the bedroom, naked.?

4.?Sometimes all you need is a hug or someone to tell you everything will be ok,or some rough sex or whatever??

5.?Sex is like math: You add the bed,subtract the clothes, divide the legs and pray you don?t multiply.?

6.?Sleeping alone is a waste of my sexual talent.?funny sex quotes

7.?Do you ever just look at somebody and wonder how they moan during sex.?

8.?I need a back rub,a few shots of whiskey, and some great sex.?funny sex quotes

9.?If you don?t laugh during sex at least once, you?re having sex with the wrong person.?

10.?A healthy relationship is built on a lot of smiles and an insane amount of orgasms??

11.?The only BS I need in my life is Breakfast and sex.?funny sex quotes

12.?I?m in my bed. You?re in your bed. One of us is in the wrong place.?

13.?If you bite my lips or kiss my neck, I promise to rip your fucking clothes off.?

14.?Falling in love is easy. Having sex is easier. But bumping into someone that can spark your soul that shit is rare.?

15.?Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to. Unless you?re in prison.?funny sex quotes

16.?Your clothes would look nice on my bedroom floor.?

17.?Men are a lot like infants,if you want to shut them up, put your boobs in their mouth.?

18.?I don?t care if you have small boobs,I still want to see them.?funny sex quotes

19.?14,000 people are having sex right now, 25,000 are kissing. 50,000 are hugging. And you?well you?re reading this mug.?

20.?What women do after sex: 2% Eat; 3% Smoke; 4% Sleep; 5% Take a shower; 86% Finish the job THEMSELVES;?

21.?If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you. ? ? Dorothy Parker

22.?I miss you almost as much as I miss having sex with you.?funny sex quotes

23.?Always start your day with a lot of SEX: S ? mile; E ? nergy; X ? citement; so make SEX a daily habit, and you will always be SMILING!?

24.?I love you with all my boobs. I would say heart, but my boobs are bigger.?

25.?The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she?s 17 years, 11 months old.?

26.?Having sex with your ex on a thursday isn?t cheating. it?s a throwback.?funny sex quotes

27.?If a boy tells you to suck it,smile and say, ? I?m sorry. My mom told me never to put small things in my mouth.?

28.?I can?t wait to get home and have make up sex? I?ve been arguing with myself all day!?

29.?Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don?t have a good partner. You?d better have a good hand.?

30.?Don?t hate me because I?m beautiful?Hate me because your boyfriend thinks I am.?

31.?A sex symbol becomes a thing. I hate being a thing.?funny sex quotes

32. ?Friday is my second favorite F word.?funny sex quotes

33.?Roses are red, Violets are blue, I?m using my hand but I?m thinking of you.?

34.?What every man wants is a lady by day and a sexual goddess by night.?

35.?They say try everything once, not everyone once.?Dirty quotes

36.?I wish you could last as long in bed as you do in an argument.?

37.?I don?t have a dirty mind, I have a sexy imagination.?Dirty quotes

38.?Sex is like pizza, When it?s good, it?s good and when it?s bad, it?s still pretty good!?

39.?Can I have you for breakfast in bed today??Dirty quotes

40.?I cant taste my lips could you do it for me?Dirty quotes

41.?You could put a blond wig on a hot-water heater and some dude would try to f**k it.? ? Tina Fey

42.?I love the way you fuck me.?Dirty quotes

43.?Fuck me on this floor right now, Mister.?Dirty quotes

44.?I want to taste me on your fingers.?Dirty quotes

45.?Your lips are like wine and I want to get drunk.?Dirty quotes

46.?It may be between your legs, but it belongs to me. Understand??

47.?I?ll kiss you in the rain so you get twice as wet.?

48.?I just want you to be happy. And naked.?Dirty quotes

49.?Your face would look better between my legs.?Dirty quotes

50.?The best sex is when you don?t have to worry about how loud you are.?

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